


Breakfast Banter

by Zesse



Category: Yuri!!! on Ice (Anime)
Genre: Breakfast Banter, But Viktor is also whipped, Dirty Talk, Fluff, Gag kink, Like those eggs, M/M, Romantic Comedy, SEND ME TO HELL, Top!Yuri, Viktor gets stabbed in the ass, Viktor is also a sassmaster, Viktor's eggs get fertilized?, Yuri is a sassmaster, bite me, bottom!viktor, by Yuri's dick, dominant yuri, end me, extended egg pun, i don't fucking know, really short, short smut chapter, sorry - Freeform, viktor with a 'k'
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-13
Updated: 2017-03-15
Packaged: 2018-10-04 07:00:56
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,825
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10270934
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zesse/pseuds/Zesse
Summary: "Viktor Nikiforov, you insult my egg decorating capabilities and then dare to try and sit on the couch with me? I fucking think not."





	1. Chapter 1

Routines were something that Yuri had grown accustomed to over the years as a professional athelete with having to wake up before the general population to work out in time for breakfast only to go back out to practice in the rink right after. For a person who anticipated the worst, routines were a reliable foundation on which Yuri could stablize himself and embrace the familiarity. Now, being in St. Petersburg for the next competitive figure skating season, Yuri could easily say that the routine he shared with his fiance was by far his favorite, but sometimes the Russian had the capacity to get under his skin and this was, unfortunately, one those times. 

"Viktor, eggs?" He called out to his fiance who was lounging on the couch with a magazine in hand. 

"Oh, please. Can you put the ketchup in a smiley face on them?" 

Yuri sighed, shaking his head. His fiance was pretty extra, but he liked to induldge in the Russian's oddities, so he spooned out a generous portion of scrambled eggs onto the man's plate and drew a shakey red smiley face on them. 

_It kind of looks like it's groaning in agony..._

Yuri frowned at his masterpiece and hoped that Viktor would like it despite his horrendous attempt at egg decoration. "Well, you're going to have to get up and get them yourself if you really want them." 

He heard shuffling and before he knew it, Viktor was standing behind him and practically breathing down his neck. He felt warm lips brush against his nape. 

"Yuri... that looks scary." 

The Japanese man huffed in indignation, grabbed his own plate with plain eggs, ham, and toast, and wiggled his way from between the counter and Viktor's hips. He stared at the Russian man once he was free with narrowed eyes. 

"The next time you want your chicken period decorated in ketchup, make your own if you hate mine." 

And with that, Yuri made his way out of the kitchen and took his fiance's spot on the couch. Viktor's jaw dropped slightly, and he hurriedly gathered his plate to go join his annoyed lover, but was left sorely disappointed when he found Yuri's legs fully stretched out over the cushions. He inched close to the edge of the couch and stared down at Yuri hopefully, feeling the shock return when Yuri merely glanced at him whilst shoving a fork-full of egg into his mouth. 

"Viktor Nikiforov, you insult my egg decorating capabilities and then dare to try and sit on the couch with me? I fucking think not." 

"But Yuri," Viktor protested weakly, eyes glimmering, "I didn't mean it. You know what an art critic I am, but I love your eggs. Your eggs are my favorite and I always eat them, don't I?" 

Yuri cocked his head, seeming to weigh his lover's statement in his mind. His eyes crinkled at the corners when he futher narrowed them. "You mean, you eat them out of pity. Try harder." 

The Russian whined and attempted to sit on the very small edge of the couch not occupied by his fiance's legs to try and win his favor, but hissed in mild discomfort when he felt sharp toenails dig into the flesh of his ass mostly unprotected through thin sweatpants. He ended up having to sit on Yuri's feet with his lover's nails stabbing his ass.

"Fuck--Yuri, I really didn't mean it. I love that you make breakfast for me every morning and I didn't mean to insult your eggs. They're always the right consistency of fluffiness with the right amount of salt and pepper. Please forgive me?" Viktor furrowed his brows and pouted, purposefully licking his lower lip to gain his lover's attention. 

Yuri stared at the Russian long and hard, eyes drawn to the male's lips. They were kind of adorable even if they tended to say dumb shit sometimes. 

"Fine." 

He pulled his legs up and Viktor immediately scooted back and leaned against his legs in some form of affection. He mixed some of his egg with the ketchup before shoving a fork's worth into his mouth. He chewed thoughtfully for a moment before his lips curved into a sly smirk and he tilted his head back slightly to swallow, a greatly exaggerated low moan escaping him. Yuri hissed and prodded Viktor's hip with his foot.

"You don't have to make it sexual, Viktor. I already forgave you." 

"Mm... " Said Russian turned to face Yuri and propped one arm up on the Japanese man's knees to hold his face in what he thought was a seductive manuever. "I was thinking, since we just had all of this egg talk... maybe we can decorate your eggs later. Or... _fertilize_ them, rather." 

There was a moment of silence followed by another. Yuri stared at Viktor with his fork halfway up to his mouth, fluffy egg hanging off haphazardly. Then, he slowly lowered the fork back down to his plate and smiled at his Russian fiance in such a sickeningly sweet way that Viktor quickly realized his mistake and pulled back to abandon ship. 

"Vitya, first of all, you have ketchup on the corner of your lip and I expect your face to be clean if we're doing any intimate activities. Secondly, the only eggs that will be getting fertilized are _your_ eggs since you seem to be in such an ornery mood. Also: dishes, since you're being particularly ornery. There's a pile of your hot chocolate mugs in the sink that need washed out." 

Viktor's face fell as did his fork, but he did remember to flick his tongue out to lick at the ketchup on his lip. 

"Yuri--" 

"Dishes, Vitya. Then I fully expect to see your naked ass on the bed by the time I'm finished eating. In that exact order."


	2. Fertilization

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> A bonus smut chapter since some people wanted it I guess. I kept it on the short side since I have a longer piece (also top!Yuri) that I'm working on right now.

Viktor Nikiforov didn't regret many things in his life so far and if he did, they were usually related to Yuri and how he should have chased after the younger skater much sooner than he had. Well, this night happened to be one that he was regretting, and dreadfully so. He knew that antagonizing his lover was a bad idea, especially now that Yuri seemed to be unleashing his inner Eros more often, but he never imagined that his fiancé would get even with him like this. 

"Hmmngh-" The silverette groaned into the makeshift gag-that damned tie-and fixed his head to peer back at his fiancé, and when his eyes met dark brown, his body trembled in anticipation when the thrusts slowed to nothing. 

"Now Vitya, I keep telling you that aren't allowed to look. Quit being bad." Yuri hissed at him and wove his fingers through the Russian's hair only to forcibly shove the man's head against the mattress in that rough way he knew Viktor got off on. When he felt that Viktor would be unable to move his head again, Yuri pulled out of the male halfway and then pushed inside until his hips were flush with the silverette's supple ass. 

Viktor could only groan and wiggle his hips, feeling the head of his fiancé's cock much deeper than it had been before. Yuri tutted at him and slowly rolled his hips against the Russian, cock fighting against the silverette's naturally tight velvet walls. "You like that, Vitya?" 

"Mmn... " He moaned lowly and rocked his hips back encouragingly, pleading for his lover to move faster. 

"I don't think you've earned it." Yuri sassed him and released his hold on Viktor's hips. "Maybe you should show me just how bad you want your eggs _fertilized_ , Vitya." 

Viktor whimpered in response, feeling his face heat up at the damned egg pun he used on his fiancé just an hour earlier. He had a horrible feeling that Yuri wasn't about to let that go for a long time and then some. 

"Whining doesn't get you anything, baby. Show me." 

Viktor mentally cursed his lover and shifted his weight more or less to his knees and started rocking back onto Yuri's cock at a slow, steady pace. The Japanese man purred and ran his hands over the silverette's ass as he moved, clearly enjoying the show. Viktor tensed when he felt Yuri's hands squeezing him but he didn't break pace; breaking pace meant that Yuri would likely abandon him on the bed again. For hours. Tied up. 

"So good," Yuri murmured and gently swatted at the Russian's ass, eliciting a surprised, muffled gasp from the man. "Faster, Vitya. I know that you're a whore for this cock." 

"Hmng!" Viktor hissed through the tie and moved his hips back as fast as he could without falling over, hands clenching at the pillow by his head. It wasn't fair that Yuri could talk dirty to him and he couldn't respond in ways that weren't gasps or moans. Definitely not fair at all. "Hm! Mm... !" 

Yuri's hand was wrapped around his neglected cock and squeezing. "Yes, good boy. Vitya is so pretty when he whimpers... " 

Viktor rolled his hips back much harder, forcing the tip of Yuri's cock against his prostate, forcing a barely muffled scream out of him. Yuri, surprised, grabbed a hold of his lover's hips and guided his movements in what was much appreciated relief for the Russian.

"Shit-I'm going to cum inside you." Yuri dipped his head and bit at Viktor's shoulder, leaving a small but red patch of skin behind. 

It was all the warning Viktor got before he felt the sudden rush of warmth inside of him and then on his thighs when some of Yuri's release managed to spill out. He whined and tried to grind his ass back against Yuri's hips but was left disappointed when his Japanese lover pulled out of him, worsening the state of his thighs when more cum dribbled down them. He shivered and his body very nearly went slack.

"...you were so good, gorgeous," Yuri commended Viktor as he normally would after sex while pulling the tie free from the Russian's mouth. "So good." 

Viktor hesitantly shifted to lay on his side once the tie was out of his mouth, facing Yuri. "...thank you, but I'm still hard, as you can clearly see. "

"Oh." 

Yuri stared long and hard at him before shrugging. "I only said I was going to fertilize eggs tonight. I never said anything about making _you_ cum." 

For the second time that day, Viktor's jaw went slack with disbelief and he sat up, clearly outraged. Yuri glanced down at his lover's lower half, somewhat impressed by the messy state he'd left the poor Russian in. 

"Yuri, you can't leave me like this. I'm hard and you just fucked me and came in my ass and I'm still neeeeedy--"

Yuri sighed and patted Viktor's head. 

"Shower. You're covered in cum and sweat."

When Viktor's expression dropped, Yuri leaned in and kissed his lover's chapped lips. 

"I'll join you."


End file.
